Tap into your confidence and energy
In this section, we break down the concept of confidence into a set of practical, easy-to-use principles. These articles will help you understand and cultivate the essential characteristics of confidence, and apply them in every area of your life — at home, at work, and out in the world.

How to Hold Great Eye Contact

My friends don’t have it easy. They always serve as unknowing test subjects in my social experiments. I write “unknowing,” but I do feel like they suspect at least something. One clue is that their first question always seems to be: “What book are you currently reading?”. Probably a veiled attempt to foresee the experiment they are about to undergo. Meeting me for drinks is like Google’s “I’m feeling lucky” button. Did I just read up on comedy, or on vulnerability? Well, let me tell you, you’re looking at two VERY different evenings here. In preparation for this article, I … Read More

in Art of Dating, Building A Connection, Confidence

Building Confidence — The Skyline of Life

Building Confidence -- The Skyline of Life

Confidence, like a building, takes a lot of effort to develop, regular maintenance to keep it in good shape, but just a single blow to destroy it. Here’s how to ensure you’re nurturing — and not abandoning — your confidence to the elements. [Photo by gags9999] It can take months, years, even decades to build a superstructure or sky rise building. But it can take just minutes to knock it down. Confidence is a lot like a building. It takes a lot of effort to develop, regular maintenance to keep it in good shape, but just a single blow to … Read More

in Confidence, Self Mastery

How to Restore Your Confidence After It Takes A Hit

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If you’re working hard and taking chances in life, here’s an uncomfortable truth: You will fail from time to time, and certainly more than the average person. The cost of confronting your limitations, of course, is your sense of confidence, the one quality we need to succeed and risk losing when we fail. Understanding how to restore confidence when it dips is an essential skill, and it depends on three core components: attitude, knowledge and experience. By working within those three domains, we can learn to rebuild and sustain confidence through its natural ebbs and flow. Adopting the powerful principle … Read More

in Art of Dating, Confidence

Birdman, Self-Doubt, and the Fear of Criticism

Birdman, Self-Doubt, and the Fear of Criticism

In this writer’s estimation, anyone who has ever attempted to make/do/create something (isn’t that all of us?) should be able to take away something from the movie Birdman.[Image by Fox Searchlight] Author’s note: There are minor Birdman spoilers in here. If you haven’t seen the film yet, reading this won’t necessarily ruin it for you, but some of this piece might not make as much sense. (Also, what are you waiting for?) I loved Birdman — both times I watched it, and likely when I’ll see it again. As a viewer, I enjoyed the incredible single-take cinematography, powerful performances, and … Read More

in Confidence

Solving the Authenticity Paradox (How To Be Who You Really Are)

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Ah, how to be authentic. Authenticity is one of those qualities that has become so desirable, so sought after, that it has been reduced — just like generosity and gratitude — to a meaningless cliché. And yet everything we teach at The Art of Charm, from storytelling to approaching to confronting limiting beliefs, seems to come back to the core concept of being who you are, which might just be the most difficult skill you can master. Authenticity is as elusive as it is powerful, but so many people are still baffled by the notion of how to be authentic. … Read More

in Approaching A Woman, Confidence, Deal Making & Negotiations, Entrepreneurship, Flirting And Attraction, Networking, Self Mastery

3 Proven Behavioral Strategies To Stop Being Needy Immediately

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Recently I wrote an article on how guys are needy in ways they don’t even realize. And while I hope you were able to make some changes based on what you read there, we really need to address the inner issue. Neediness stems from a fundamental lack of confidence and self-esteem. That might sound like a tall order to have to defeat. In some sense it is. You’re attempting to undo several decades of learned behavior. However damaging your lack of confidence and low self-esteem are, they’ve gotten you to where you are in life right now. You’ve chosen to … Read More

in Confidence

5 Signs You Are Needy and How It Is Affecting Your Life

Some guys come to The Art of Charm knowing they’re needy. Other guys need to be told. In fact, I’d say most men who are being needy in a relationship (or in general) don’t know they’re being needy — or how they’re needy, which can be even trickier to spot. And yet neediness is one of those qualities, like insecurity and general awkwardness, that can fester for years, often without anyone diagnosing it, often without the person even realizing it’s there. It can destroy romantic relationships, compromise professional opportunities, and contribute to a cycle of frustration, depression, and dissatisfaction. It’s … Read More

in Confidence

Selena Soo | Creating VIP Connections (Episode 361)

Selena Soo is the PR maven running S2 Groupe. We chat about mistakes people make when creating VIP connections, and more on episode 361 of The Art of Charm.

Add value before asking for anything. “Picking someone’s brain is like picking someone’s pocket.” -Selena Soo The Cheat Sheet: How did Selena create a relationship with Ramit Sethi? Breakfast, lunch, or coffee: which is the best meeting suggestion? How to talk to an influencer and create the foundation for a friendship. Why and when to not ask for advice. What are the three fastest ways to add value to someone’s life? And so much more… If you believe in the old adage you become the sum of your five closest friends and you want to create VIP connections, do you know … Read More

in Business, Confidence, Connecting, Podcast

Create the Ultimate Social Sales Funnel

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Jon Levy really gets how the social sales funnel works, and why it’s so important. Jordan recently had the leading behavior expert, consultant and writer on The Art of Charm Podcast, and I was amazed at how much overlap there is between what he’s doing and what we’re doing. Among others, Levy has had Nobel laureates, royalty — literal royalty, not the metaphorical “Hollywood royalty” kind — and Olympic medal winners operating at the pinnacle of influence and prestige in the world. The concept of a social sales funnel is one of my favorite developments at The Art of Charm. … Read More

in Confidence, Entrepreneurship, Networking, Productivity

How to Go From Single to Sexy Dad

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You know what women find sexy? Among other things, great fathers. Jordan recently did a podcast with two of our bootcamp alums — both of them single dads — to discuss how the program made them a better man, a better father and a more attractive prospect to women. It was a fascinating look at single dads and dating. Of course, these three qualities are deeply connected. It can often feel like having a successful family competes with having a successful dating life — there are always trade-offs, for sure — but as we’ve discovered, they can also go hand … Read More

in Break-Ups & Divorce, Confidence, Dating Tips, Flirting And Attraction